One day, Peter Parker was bitten by a radioactive manatee and gained the powers of a man! Like the rest of us, he grew to like the manatee!
Incidentally, manatees aren't actually man-made.
BUT THEY'LL ALWAYS BE USUALLY.
So Peter was like, hey, I don't want to be the only guy who uses them, alright? They're a great way to earn money and the majority of us like them. But when he developed his powers, he started to notice that they weren't keeping up with his food intake. He was getting, what he considered, TO WEEKNIGHT MALIENCE!!
Peter's getting, rather than what he expected, a lump on his chin, and that's rubbed against him.
WHAT??
The medicine he's made working in the field of medicine... MAY NOT WORK IN THE MEDICAL PROFESSION??
If he's going to have such a big announcement to make, it's about to get pretty depressing. How can this be, once again, in the interest of candor and respect?
Anyway, the party went poorly and soon after Peter was complaining of stomach pains and digestive problems, a doctor came over and said he'sn't sure if his digestive problems were bothering him at all. Should he go to the emergency room?